The Cadillac Cowboy
by gneebee
Summary: She knew the type. He thought he was a real smooth operator who'd feed her lines and drinks all night long and then get lucky. Yeah well he had another think coming. No man was getting lucky with her ever again...Merle Dixon and Beth Greene Romance / Humor AU no ZA


**A/N It's been a while since I've posted a Merle and Beth story and I apologize. You know I love the big man and I hope you'll enjoy this story of The Cadillac Cowboy.  
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She didn't care if she never saw another man. They were all nothing but a bunch of lying jerks and she decided she was never wasting her time on one again. She'd be much better off without one. A lot better off.

Last Friday night had been the last straw, that's when she'd seen Zach with that redheaded bitch. Although seriously, why be mad at the redhead? Zach was the asshole. They'd been together three years, how could she have missed seeing what a no good lying, cheating piece of crap he was?

Of course she'd made the same mistake with Jimmy. Obviously she was a lousy judge of character and clueless to boot. He'd been just as big a liar and cheater as Zach.

A total of five years of her precious life she'd never get back, wasted on buttheads. No more, EVER.

She decided to take herself out for a few drinks and start making plans for a better and brighter future, alone. Or maybe with a cat. A cat might be good. A female cat.

The following Saturday night she called a cab and went down to that country bar she knew of, the Painted Pony, it wasn't far from her office building. She'd been thinking on this all week. Heck she didn't even miss Zach. She supposed maybe she'd been guilty of just hanging on because she didn't have a next move. So that was her part in it, but that still didn't excuse what he'd done. Nosiree.

She walked in and took herself right up to the bar, as if she did this every Saturday night. The truth was, she'd never been in a bar alone, but none of these people knew that, now did they?

She'd never been much of a drinker but maybe that was the first thing she should change, she'd get a little more adventurous. So when the bartender asked, "Good evening Miss, what can I get you to drink?" She replied with great resolve, "I'll have whiskey and 7-Up please."

"You got it, Whiskey and 7 coming right up."

And no sooner had the bartender set the drink down when seemingly out of nowhere a big fellow in a cowboy hat said, "I'll get that for the little lady."

She was feeling downright saucy, empowered in her new incarnation as Beth Greene the Single, Independent Woman who didn't want a man, "You can buy me all the drinks you want as long as you understand all you're getting at the end of the evening is an empty wallet. That and I'm not your Little Lady."

And that big ol' cowboy started laughing hard, and his laugh was extra loud and boisterous and his smile seemed to spread clear across his whole face. He slapped his open palm down loudly on the bar, finally caught a breath and told her, "Damn Sugar ya just break a man down right from the get-go, don't ya?"

"Yes it's my style, I'm honest. And for the record, I'm not your Sugar."

Oh yeah, she was going to be a challenge, but he liked that in a woman. He'd spotted this one the minute she walked in the joint. She wasn't built quite like he liked them to be, but she was still hotter than a pistol and oh so well put together. And he could spot those gals a mile away, the broken-hearted ones or the ones that had been shit on by some guy and might need some comforting, you know, by a professional comfort provider.

Yeah there was nothing he wanted more this night than to be in the driver's seat with this hot little number. Then he'd move on tomorrow, leave room for her to meet a nice guy.

Merle Dixon was thoughtful that way.

She thought he looked familiar, real familiar, but she couldn't quite place him. Anyway that didn't really matter, she had his number, she knew the type he was. He thought he was a smooth operator who'd feed her lines and drinks all night long and then get lucky. Yeah well he had another think coming. No man was getting lucky with her ever again.

He held his glass up to toast her and she went right along with that, clinking glasses, "Here's to ya Dumplin' I think I'ma enjoy chattin' ya up."

"Well I am a brilliant conversationalist, but what I am not is your Dumplin'."

"Fair enough Angel. So what is it ya do for a livin'?"

"I'm a professional wrestler and again, not your Angel."

He was laughing so hard he swore he had a tear, "Professional wrestler huh? Ya got a day job Peaches?"

"Yes, by day I'm in pharmaceutical sales, it's just at night I'm a wrestler, and not your Peaches." And they both laughed now.

"I used ta be quite involved in pharmaceuticals myself, too involved, so I gave 'em up a few years ago and just started concentratin' on these here liquid medications, Lamb Chop."

And now she laughed so hard she had her own tears, "Well even though I am not your Lamb Chop now I feel a need to know what it is you do for a living."

He tried to muster up a hurt look when he told her, "Why Sweetness, I'm heart broke ya don't recognize me, I'm Merle Dixon the Cadillac Cowboy, selling ya all the used cars, pickup trucks and recreation vehicles your little heart desires."

Now she knew just who he was. He was all over the local TV and radio channels, the Cadillac Cowboy, and she was still laughing. "Not your Sweetness but I have seen you Merle Dixon, and let me just say now that I know you're a used car salesman I understand why you're so full of b.s."

"Well now that there's just mean Pumpkin, I didn't cast no aspersions on your profession, did I now?"

"Even though I am not your Pumpkin I will agree that was unfair, a person shouldn't generalize. Please forgive me Merle Dixon."

"A course I forgive ya Honey, now ya know my name but I am at a serious disadvantage because ya ain't yet told me your name."

"Well it isn't Honey, its Beth Greene. And now that you know that maybe when you run out of endearments you'll call me by my name."

"Ah Beth is a beautiful name for a beautiful woman, how could I ever run out of endearments for you Babycakes?"

"I don't know the answer to that but I am starting to think you will never run out of bullshit. And by the way, not your Babycakes."

He grabbed his chest and nearly doubled over, "Ouch Precious that was a real knife ta the heart right there. Accusin' ol' Merle a slingin' bullshit."

And with that she thought to herself, Merle Dixon is way too old, way too full of shit, and well kind of sexy and real funny, and yeah, kind of sexy. And she couldn't remember having this much fun talking to a man since, well never, she'd never had this much fun talking to a man.

Suddenly she was at a loss for words so she settled for, "Not your Precious."

"I see now why you're less than pleased with me, I been negligent in my duties here, why you're in need of a refill on your refreshment Pussycat."

He liked her dammit, he wasn't supposed to fall in like, that wasn't how this went. But besides being an 11 on the 1 to 10 scale, she was funny and obviously bright and she could go toe to toe with his bullshit. Yep, no denying it, this was turning into a serious case of like. But that didn't mean he was taking it any further than one night, it just meant he'd enjoy this night just all that much more.

Their drinks arrived and she did break down and give him a big smile, "Thank you Merle, but I am no Pussycat."

"You're welcome Puddin' if they served champagne in this joint I'd insist they bring ya that. A beautiful woman like you oughta have champagne ta drink, not whiskey."

"As much as I appreciate the sentiment and the compliment and the drinks, I am certainly NOT Pudding. So Merle since we're being real honest here, what is it exactly you're looking for tonight? A future of love, romance and a herd of babies, or are you looking for a roll in the hay with a much younger blond?"

That took him completely by surprise, "Damn Buttercup, ya just get right ta the heart a the matter, don't ya now? I mean I thought we was enjoyin' the evenin' together, an I cannot be untruthful with ya, I'd like nuthin' more than a roll in the hay with a beautiful blond, but shit, I's goin' for a little romance first. And just so ya know, I may be older Buttercup but I'm real, real able."

"Okay all that's real good to know. I'm steering clear of love and romance forever. But this is all new to me, just since I caught my boyfriend with a redhead last Friday night. So I may, at some point in the evening, decide I'm interested in a roll in the hay just to take my mind off things tonight. But I'm making no guarantees, and I'm making that clear to you, just so there's no disappoints and ill-feelings later. And I should also point out, I am not your Buttercup." Now she knew why they called booze liquid courage. She couldn't believe she just said all that to this stranger.

"Alright then, let's do us a little reboot here. Lemme get us a seat over at that table. We can enjoy our refreshments, do some dancin', a little romancin' an you can decide whether ya wanna make this ol' cowboy's dreams come true or not. How's that sound Lovey?"

"That sounds good Merle, let's do that. Not your Lovey."

He didn't try any overt moves or even any covert moves, he kept his arm wrapped only on the back of her chair. The band started up and the first song was a faster one, a two-step number, "Creepin'" by Eric Church, "Would ya let me take ya for a spin around the dance floor Rosebud?"

"I'd like that a lot Merle, but I quite detest being called Rosebud."

"My sincere apologies Schmoopy, I won't say it again." By then they were on the dance floor and she couldn't believe what a great dancer he was. Holy cow he was a first class bullshitter and an even better two-stepper. Why people were even making room for them out there on the floor.

The band went right into a slower one, one that was perfect for a country waltz. While he moved her around the dance floor to George Strait's, "You Look So Good in Love," he surprised her again with his mastery of this old fashioned country dance, but she was more surprised by how much she liked having him hold her.

She was mighty tiny but damn, she felt real good in his arms, well as much as a woman is in your arms for a waltz. He was sending telepathic messages to the band to play a real slow one. Sadly the next song was an old, old Bob Wills tune, a country swing.

OMG he was spinning her around that dance floor now like she couldn't believe, she felt like she was running out of oxygen but he didn't miss a step. There was obviously nothing wrong with the shape he was in.

Finally the band started playing the slow song he'd been hoping for. It was from a few years back, but damn it was not just slow, it was hot and sexy, Billy Currington's "Must be Doing Something Right." It was perfect for real close dancing with the beautiful Beth Greene.

Romance was not really his thing. Sure he talked a good game of romance, women seemed to crave that shit, but as far as real romance for Merle Dixon, no. But the feeling of this petite woman in his arms and pressed up tight to him, while they moved slowly around the dance floor, it was feeling real romantic. He was a little fearful he was falling deeper into like with Beth Greene.

She was wishing she never had to leave those big strong arms. This cowboy was more than just a good looking bullshitter, he had all the right moves. This dance with him was the most romantic experience she'd ever had, and as she was thinking that he whispered in her ear, "Ya feel like you was made ta be right here Darlin', right here in my arms."

And she leaned her head back just a little to look up at him, "That one, Darlin', I'll be your Darlin' tonight."

He smiled broadly and then pulled her as close into him as was possible, maybe closer. And he hadn't even been bullshitting, she really did feel like she was made to be right there in his arms.

When the song ended they made their way back to the table and now his arm was wrapped around her shoulders and their faces inches apart. They were trying real hard to act nonchalant, like they weren't all hot and bothered, which they surely were.

He threw in the towel on this pretense, "Let me take ya back ta my place Darlin'. We can have us a little drink there and dance right in the livin' room, or out by the pool. Whatever ya like Darlin', I aim ta please."

"What about later, will you take me home right after we, well you know?"

He was a little shocked by the bluntness and also by the fact that most woman thought they were spending the night. That's why he never brought women home, he always went to their place, so he could make a getaway after the deed was done. But he must have lost his mind and now he'd made the offer he couldn't back out. It was a relief to know she'd be leaving right after. "A course I will Darlin' if that's what ya want I'll take ya right home."

She was acting like a real bad girl, a real bad crazy girl, she knew it and she just didn't care. Dammit, she deserved her night of fun and the Cadillac Cowboy was anxious to give it to her. So be it, she was tired of being a good girl. All being a good girl had ever gotten her was disappointment.

He escorted her to the parking lot, never taking his hand from her back. When she saw his vehicle she actually gasped. It was a 1955 Cadillac El Dorado. It had those big fins on the back and it was shiny black with red and white tuck and roll upholstery, and big white sidewall tires. Of course, it was a convertible. "This is the most beautiful piece of machinery I've ever seen Merle Dixon, I can hardly wait to ride in it."

"Best ride you'll ever have is in a Cadillac, especially an El Dorado. She is a beaut and I'm real glad ya like her." He opened the passenger door and helped her in, but when he went to the driver's side he didn't open the door, he leaped right in over it, like one of those 50's movies show guys doing. He impressed her more every minute.

She was really happy the Caddie had a bench seat because she slid right over and cuddled up next to him. She only got to be with this man one night and she was going to go for the gusto, because she was already thinking she might miss him.

Damn she felt good there snugged into him. As a rule he didn't care for a gal to slide over like that, like she was claiming him, but he had no complaints about Beth Greene getting just as close as she wanted to.

"Feelin' good Darlin'?"

"Yes Merle, this is perfect."

He couldn't argue, it seemed perfect to him too.

When they pulled in his driveway she was stunned. The huge house was like a miniature version of an antebellum mansion. It was in the Federal style with a center entrance, a big covered porch, balcony, and of course Greek style pillars. The roof was gabled and the windows perfectly and evenly spaced. She couldn't wait to see the inside, hoping there was one of those grand staircases, she'd only seen houses like this in photographs.

"My gosh Merle, I had no idea, I never would have guessed, never placed the Cadillac Cowboy in an old south style house."

"Yeah I know Darlin', I seem like the type that oughta be livin' out in the woods in an old rundown shack. And there was a time when I did. But that was before I became the Cadillac Cowboy, top sellin' car deal, new or used, in the south. I'm not just here in Georgia, my dealerships are spread out to all areas a the southern U.S. Why GM has even asked me if I'd care ta become a franchisee for a new car dealership. I'm thinkin' about takin' 'em up on that."

Why was he bothering to tell a one night stand so much personal business? Must be this like thing he was feeling for her.

"I thought you just had one dealership, I had no idea how big a deal the Cadillac Cowboy was." She had a million dollar smile and the prettiest eyes he'd ever laid his own eyes on.

"Well come on in Darlin', let me get some refreshments goin' for us."

When he opened the front door she saw it, the grand staircase. So gorgeous. Everything was just like she'd imagined it should look. "You have wonderful taste everything is perfectly suited to this style."

He chuckled then, "Well I guess I hired the right interior designer Darlin'. My secretary Sasha, insisted I not be left ta my own devices, she knows I'm just a redneck boy at heart. She was kinda panicked I'd be decoratin' the whole joint in camo. Who knows what the place woulda ended up lookin' like. I only insisted on a couple of accommodations ta my own thing. The grand ballroom is my hang out room now, not a grand ballroom. Who the hell needs a grand ballroom in this day n age, not a redneck boy from the hills a Georgia, that's for damn sure. There's a real nice wet bar, theater style seatin' and a projection TV in that ballroom now. That's where my little brother an me watch football an huntin' n fishin' shows, play pool an do some serious beer drinkin'." Shit why didn't he just tell her his whole life story?

"But enough a all this house talk, c'mon, lemme make ya that drink an we'll turn on some music."

He went behind the bar and fixed their drinks, and then turned behind him and started up the sound system. It was perfect.

He walked around to her, handed her the drink but before she could say, "Thank you," he took it back, set both their drinks on the bar, weaved his hands into her hair and gave her the kind of kiss that made a woman know a man wanted every part of her. "Ya okay Darlin', okay with the idea a takin' these drinks upstairs?"

She knew what he was asking her, and again she knew it was probably wrong, but dammit it felt right and she wanted this with him, even if it was just for tonight.

He was starting to think one night with this woman would never be enough. But she'd set the rules, all she wanted him for was a roll in the hay. He'd take what he could get.

She was a little too nervous to really take in the expansive beauty of the master suite, instead she took a big drink of her cocktail to try and calm those nerves. He set their drinks on the nightstand and again pulled her close. His hands were wrapped in her hair and they started kissing and they were both lost in their desires and their need, their kissing was hard, and the hunger strong.

While he kissed her his hand moved to touch her breasts over her dress, and she reacted with a soft moan. She never wore a bra, she saw no real need, so when he wasted no time pulling the zipper of her dress down, she knew she'd soon be completely exposed.

But before he slipped the dress off enough to reveal her breasts he asked, "Ya sure Darlin'?"

"Yes Cowboy, I'm real sure." And she was, but she was also just a little embarrassed. She knew how small breasted she was. Zach never quit nagging her to get implants. But her Cowboy took one of those breasts in his mouth, sucked on it and teased at the nipple with his tongue, while his hand fondled and tweaked her other breast, to the point she was ready for more. But he moved to kiss her on the lips while he continued to tease the breast with his hand. And he whispered, "Them are the sweetest most perfect titties I ever have seen Darlin'." And he wasn't kidding, he decided he'd missed out always going for those big jugs.

She knew it was probably a line but it sounded so good to her, especially because he was continuing his attentions to her body and it was craving more of those attentions. He slipped her dress completely off and reached behind him to set it on the chair.

She stood before him naked except for the tiniest pair of panties he'd ever seen. She looked so hot he decided he was leaving those on until just that right moment.

He didn't expect it, but he sure didn't try to stop it when she reached both hands to the bottom of his shirt, and with one fast movement pulled in opposite directions, and all the snaps on that western style shirt came open.

Her small delicate hands moved softly across his bare chest, shoulders and back and when she sucked and nibbled at his nipple, as he had done with her, he was surprised by the warm rush her attentions brought him.

It was then he lifted her up and gently lay her on the bed, but once they were both on that bed there was no more gentleness. They were starving for each other and they weren't pretending any different. It was hot, it was passionate, it was immensely satisfying for the both of them. But it was not slow and romantic love making. It was, "I got to have every bit a your lovin' right this damn minute," sex. Neither one of them had a single complaint.

He thought this was when she'd want to go right home, but just as he was ready to roll on over and exit that big bed, damn if she didn't roll over and snug herself right into him. He wasn't one bit bothered by this seeming change of plan. He just pulled those covers up over the two of them, and he wrapped his arms around her. Damn, this was all feeling surprisingly good. Right.

Sometime during the night, maybe three hours later, the Cadillac Cowboy awoke to discover the little cowboy was standing at full attention, and he had a beautiful blond there in his arms. The Cowboy saw no dilemma, he knew right what to do.

He began to softly move his hands on her body, and he was giving that sweet little body gentle kisses and nibbles all over. She woke to find she was aroused and ready for Merle Dixon's affections.

This time it was sweet and slow and all about the love making. They explored every part of one another, and neither discovered a part that they did not find pleasing. And this love making brought a new element to the sex, and they were satisfied in ways that were not just physical.

And again, when they were both well satisfied she snugged right into him, and he didn't mind it at all. He just pulled that cover up over her sweet little body again, and wrap his arms tight around her.

And in the mornin' when again he found her very presence arousing, they had what you might think of as a kind of hybrid experience. It was some of that slow, Sunday morning love making, with flashes of unbridled passion and uncontrolled desire thrown in, like spice. But he was pretty sure the moment he fell in love was when they rolled over, she was on top of him and her little hips were giving him a work out. It was then she smiled down and breathed out those words to him, "You're a much better ride than any Cadillac, Merle."

"Damn Darlin' you are some hot sauce alright."

And when they lay there after, her tucked into him and his arms enveloping her sweet little body, the Cadillac Cowboy found himself whispering to Beth Greene, "I'm sorry Darlin', I don't think I'ma want ya leavin' today, or maybe all week, or maybe forever."

"Okay Cadillac, we'll take this one a day at a time."

She fell back into a peaceful sleep and he went to get a cup of coffee for them. He was operating that fancy schmancy coffee machine Sasha had insisted he needed. He decided that beautiful woman up in his bed would no doubt enjoy a mocha java.

The smell of the coffee woke her from her light sleep. And what she saw, well she was pretty sure that was the moment that for a reason only God would ever know, she fell in love with her Cadillac Cowboy. Not only was this hot man holding hot coffee for them, he was wearing nothing but his cowboy hat and boots.

She could not suppress her laughter, and she giggled out, "I have never seen such style Cadillac. You're definitely a breed apart."

 **Eleven Months Later**

Merle Dixon was changing what must be two month old Junior's third shitty diaper of the morning. He didn't mind. Who'd a thought he'd ever have the privilege of having a son? They figured it happened that first night, when they'd been overcome with their desire. Merle had never been careless about protection before, and neither had Beth, but there's a first time for everything. And the day she married him had been a day he was mighty proud and happy to have lived.

"Son ya shit more'n any man I ever have known, and yet I love you're little ass in spite of your capacity ta make such nasty messes. C'mon now, let's get ya all cleaned up so your Mama thinks ya look handsome."

When Junior was all duded up in his cowboy pajamas they went to visit Mama. She was in that big Jacuzzi bathtub filled sky high with bubbles and she was looking like the hot sauce she was. He handed her a tall glass of iced lemonade and said, "Looks real invitin' Darlin'."

"Oh you're always invited Cadillac."

"Hold that thought Darlin' while I go tuck Junior in for a nap."

And there was no one living in that house that wasn't feeling mighty happy Zach strayed with that redhead.

 **A/N Good times for Merle and Beth. I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did writing it. I'd really appreciate you leaving me a comment / review. Thanks so much, x gneebee**

 **To see the chapter photo, including a photo of Merle's 1955 Cadillac El Dorado, please visit my tumblr bethylmethbrick Have a wonderful day and I'll see you back here real soon with another tale of Merle and Beth. Love ya large, xo gneebee**


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